68 Crabapples for Sucky Walkers
No, actually: slow walkers doing extraneous tasks while not moving out of the way of the clear-and-present stream of traffic.
Need some examples? Well, sure. Here:
- The girl rummaging through her purse on the left ("it's here that we walk") side of the escalator, seemingly in search of the Magic Pearl of Gibraltar.
- The couple with their hands around each other's waists, barely moving forward at all, blocking an entire narrow hallway.
And this much is just true: people that walk wicked super slow... make a habit of walking wicked super slow.
Because I KNOW that they just KNOW how much it hurts my soul.
Anyway, I was stuck behind a SWDEC ("slow walker doing extra crap"-- pronounced "swid-eck") going up the stairs at the Davis T-stop tonight, and I decided I should document my inner dialogue in the hopes of overcoming this mind-debilitating annoyance.
It starts mildly:
"Hmm, I wish you would walk."
"Uh, M'am, can you walk?"
And then I start pawing anxiously at my ponytail:
"Um, yea, I actually really need you to walk."
"My mother hates you."
"Your mother hates you."
Yea, it always ends badly.
Labels: pretty things like tulips