50 Crabapples for So-Not-a-Bake-Sale

I have a bone to pick.

"With crying babies?" you ask.

But almost kinda close.

With Bake Sales.
Or, at least, with the Bake Sale I ended up at today.

I voted at an elementary school today on my lunchbreak. Because I was trading foodage with voteage, when I saw the glitter and puff paint "Bake Sale Today" sign, I followed it. I thought, "yayaaa, I will get a homemade cupcake with sprinkles and green frosting and sugary doo-dads. Maybe there will even be a frosting-outlined picture of a cat or a bell or something on it"

Instead, on the table, I see:
1. "Brownie Bites" brand brownie bites
2. Little baggies of Chex Mix
3. Single-serve packages of Chewy Chips Ahoy (which..fine...are very good, but...)
4. Juice Boxes
5. A tray of individually-packaged PB Cups.

What the fuck?

I mean, whatever, I know "people are busy" and crap, but then don't call it a fricking Bake Sale. Call it what it is: a wicked shitty convenience store in a smelly elementary school lobby.


[So, what's up with the pic? Well, I was searching for "cookie" on Creative Commons, and instead found this Cookie. Thanks go to Jose Oliveira.
Also... Brit, nice call with the filing for divorce thing. Long overdue.]


Blogger Tom said...

Dude. At our elementary school voting bake sale we've got homemade cakes and cookies. Just what you expected.

Too bad you don't vote there.

9:46 PM  
Blogger jayniek said...

that is too bad.
because then i would have also gotten to see your elementary school. which would have been cool.

were you good at dodgeball?

10:05 AM  
Blogger e$ said...


10:48 AM  
Blogger jayniek said...

yea dude.
and not even like Apple & Eve app-juice or something halfway not-gross.
We're talking stright-up Hi-C.

11:06 AM  
Blogger Caity said...

I can totally see why you were disappointed. However, I have a silver lining for you... At the school I teach at, they had a bake sale as well ... and after seeing the kids who brought in baked goods, I wouldn't eat anything. I can only imagine what some of the students' kitchens look like. So no actual baked goods, but at least you don't have food poisoning!

1:50 PM  
Blogger jayniek said...

yea, i guess the thought of grubby, sticky, snot-laced kiddo hands should have been enough to steer me away. but i was willing to put that aside for a well-frosted cupcake.

2:15 PM  

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